What HAVE been...

Fajer in Stockholm
My livingroom
My husband with Maryam and Amal
Maryam
Me in a shoppingcentra
Amal on her 4th birthday
Inside the (islamic) kindergarten in which I sometimes work extra
"Darling, where did you say you parked the car?"
Swedish coffea and cookies (and some authentic swedish people)
Visiting relatives

Dear readers,

I'm overwhelmed. By all sorts of things. I'm feeling the need to make a list here, people, but I think you're all lucky if I don't (didn't see anyone take home the Pulitzer-price from making lists). I'll try to hide some "first there's that..." and "then there's that..." in a text. Here we go. Let me know if you catch on.

Anyone who followed my blogging can sense I'm having some troubles right now. I guess I just don't know where to start. Or where to stop for that matter. Yes, I am OVERWHELMED. Questions. Critic. Emails. Conversations. Some with others, some with myself. Comments. Insights (they don't necessarily come in that order though). Learning. Seeing. Thinking. Wondering.

One part of it is that we (meaning my family) are all re-grouping after our stay in Gaza. As you might remember we were hoping to stay much longer than we actually did. A good old "It didn't turn out as we had hoped" suits fine here.

I guess anyone who goes out of her ordinary life and does something completely different, and then returns to her "old" life will of course bring new knowledge and wisdom back with her. That's where I'm at right now. Trying do deal with and incorporate that knowledge (and hopefully some wisdom as well) into our life. And it is a new life in many ways. In many ways we are starting all over. And in some ways it's still same old, same old.

Then I'm of course overwhelmed by being a mother of three small ones. All these thoughts that are running through my head has in reality no space. They are overpowered by doing the laundry and cooking the food. There's only so much a mother can do. For her children, herself or even Palestine for that matter. A lot of my thoughts goes to HOW to live this life, now that we are here. How to raise the children.

There are so many things I want to do! But as for now I have to have patience. And it's sometimes driving me crazy. 'Cause I'm running out of it.

I'm trying to get over what have been and focus on the future.

While I wrote this I ate one chocolate cake, went outside to tell off one kid who tried to take the fotball from my son, went outside again to lend a trolley to my friend who was one her way to a bengali weddingparty and her husband said she (my friend, who was wearing an arabic emerati- dress I gave her) looked so beautiful he might just marry her again, prayed Asr, and for those of you who didn't have a good laugh today can imagine me lifting up and actually SHAKING my screen upside down four times because it keeps having "black-outs". Dear God.

While I am preparing (already) for my next post I thought it be great if ya'll could practice on the pronunciation of "Gilla läget!". Here you go: [jilla] [le:gett]. That's the closest I can get without real phonetic letters. What?! Yeah, yeah, you'll understand soon enough.

Oh, and admit you've all missed my photos! Finally a real dose of what is going in my life photo-wise.

Until next time, go blog yourself!